Five Creepy Things

Here’s a list of five things that give me the creeps. See if you agree, or add something to the list.

1. People that used to have mustaches.

I don’t have to know someone to know that they use to have a mustache. You can just tell something missing. Their naked upper lip looks like the faded square left behind on a wall where a family portrait once hung. The skin looks smooth and dangerously sensitive, like the skin underneath your toenails.


2. Muscular comedians.


You can’t look tough and be funny. Although looking tough is funny, so maybe I’m wrong. Actually almost anything other than beating the crap out of someone looks stupid when done accompanied by a bunch of muscles. Picture any of the following being done by a super ripped guy…

Knitting,
Performing extremely delicate lasik eye surgery,
Calligraphy,
Reporting the news,
Framing a picture,
Diligently recording testimony on a tiny courtroom typewriter,
Building a puppet.

3. Bald guys with beards.


I’m a bald guy myself and if I so much as forget to shave for a few days I start to look like my head is on upside down.


4. Adults you haven’t seen since they were kids.


No one enjoys running into old classmates, but for me the worst part is looking at the grotesque adult version of them and feeling guilty, like I somehow left them in the oven too long, forgot about them, and now they’re over cooked. All that’s left is an eerily familiar tiny face spread out across a swollen head. The worst part is I know they’re thinking the same thing about me.


5. Little kids kissing


Dressing them up like adults doesn’t make it better, it actually makes it worse. One person’s get well card is another person’s child pornography.

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.


"Your kid is never gonna get into a good college unless he learns to finish what he starts."


Here's the leftovers...


Do you mind buddy? You’re blocking my sun.

Please call for help, we were mugged by a group of adorable six year olds!

Do you mind? You’re standing on my crotch.

When the tide comes in, tell my wife I love her.

Where did you think Giuliani put all the homeless?

You’re really tall.

Whatever you do don’t struggle.

We nominate you to go for help.

It’s too easy, I think he wants you to try to escape so he can hunt you down.

First TRACY screening!

Yesterday evening we had our first screening of TRACY in it's near completed form to an audience of 25 friends, and I'm so happy to say that it went really well! People laughed where they were suppose to laugh, and genuinely seemed to enjoy the more sincere aspects of the film. This is a real kick in the ass to stay aggressive and finish the film by my planned target of December 2008. The next step is to address the notes from this screening and show it again in September. After that I'd really like to get it in front of a less familiar audience and see how it plays. I'm just not exactly sure how to do that.

Can't wait for all of you to see the film!

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.
"So, what do you think of the new tv?"




Here's the left overs....

The new wallpaper makes me feel so insignificant.

Oh no, I think I see a spider on the wall!

We were going to send him to his room for drawing on the walls but we decided to send him to NASA instead.

The place looks so much bigger since we knock down that wall.

"Tracy" Vintage Merchandise of the Month

Here is this month's vintage Tracy merchandise made for the film. This is an Imagination Train Station cereal box inspired by the classic 70's cereal boxes I grew up with.

Principle Photography on TRACY is a Wrap!!!!!!!!

In early May of 2003 my friend Brian Fee and I ventured out to shoot the first image for our first feature film together called TRACY. This is that photograph...

Five years later, I am SO happy, and proud to say that Wednesday night my wife Michele and I filmed the very last live action shot of principle photographer for that same film! This is that final image...

It seems impossible for me to truly appreciate every lesson learned on this film. But I'm so very proud of what Brian, Michele, Tom, Elizabeth, Adrian, Scott, Bernadette, and Alex and so many of my other very talented friends contributed to this project. In two weeks we're having our first test screening. Wish us luck!

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.



"Getting the sex change was easy, it's the shoes I can't seem to part with."


Here's the left overs...

They distract from my horrible tie.

My wife got the house and the kids, and I took what mattered to her most.

What's your size?

Grand Dog

Here's a painting of my dog Carol I did for my mom a few months ago.