Caveat Productions

This week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2012-01-23T08:58:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Anyone order a Greek salad?"

Here are this week's nominees...

“I can remember when she was just a fuzzy yellow intern.”
Submitted by Jon Williams
Raleigh, N.C.

“And we always thought it would be robots that would replace us.”
Submitted by George Gropper
Boston, Mass.

"That's strange—some of my twigs are missing, too."
Submitted by Kenneth Berniker
El Cerrito, Calif.

I entered...

"Some people in the office found your breakfast offensive."

this week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2012-01-16T02:10:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"That mouse you ate makes your butt look big."

Here are the left overs...

Ever since that apple showed up things have gotten weird.

Well it wasn't me!

Here are this week's nominees...

"Have you always felt like a victim?"
Submitted by Lee Wilkof
Terryville, Conn.

"Sorry, I drifted off there. What did you say after 'I've been shot'?"
Submitted by Todd Pettigrew
Glace Bay, Nova Scotia

"Unfortunately, your time is up, but I think we have a general outline of the problem."
Submitted by Heather Lee
Walnut Creek, Calif.

I entered...

"Anyway, enough about me, how are you doing?"

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2012-01-11T09:01:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Some people in the office found your breakfast offensive."

Here are the leftovers...

You can't refer to an employee as a "Chick".

Here are this week's nominees...

"I was hoping for eternal rest."
Submitted by Matthew Greenbaum
New York, N.Y.

“A clear day? I hadn't thought of that.”
Submitted by Thomas Whipp
Shorewood, Wis.

“I'm doing O.K., but I do miss my Lycra bike shorts. And Mildred, of course.”
Submitted by Stan Kantrowitz
Los Angeles, Calif.

I entered...

"Kind of hoped there'd be Segways."

this week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2012-01-01T22:54:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Anyway, enough about me, how are you doing?"

Here are the leftovers...

I'm afraid we're just about out of time.

You're awfully quiet.

Here's this week's nominees...

"They say jolliness skips a generation."
Submitted by Jotham Burrello
Ashford, Conn.

"There goes eighty-three years of brand equity down the drain."
Submitted by Harris Ferrell
Forest Hills, N.Y.

"Must be the pesticides."
Submitted by Douglass Gilbert
Greensboro, N.C.

I entered...

"He'll be Jolly again; he just needs to eat something."

This week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-12-26T23:36:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Kind of hoped there'd be Segways."

Here are this week's nominees...

“Did anyone turn in a cape last night?”
Submitted by Theodore Frant, Jr.
Groton, Conn.

"Please tell me that was your car I just backed into."
Submitted by James Demers
New York, N.Y.

“The invisible man picked up my tab.”
Submitted by Steve Case
Tuscaloosa, Ala.

I entered...
"There's an invisible car outside with it's lights on."

2011 Holiday Card

2011-12-22T09:22:00.000-08:00

Here's this year's family holiday card! It celebrates my less than perfect spelling, and punctuation.

You can see some more of our old cards here.

Front

Inside

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-12-12T20:38:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"He'll be Jolly again; he just needs to eat something."

Here's the leftovers...

They warn us about building in the Valley of the Jolly Green Giant.

Well you don't get that big eating frozen peas and corn.

Here's this week's nominees...

"Actually, it came with the glasses."
Submitted by Margot Williams
Ypsilanti, Mich.

"I was just made pardner."
Submitted by Jeremy Fain
Los Angeles, Calif.

"Be careful about Ctrl-M."
Submitted by Louis Pappas
Washington, D.C.

I entered...

"Did I miss anything while I was napping?"

this Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-12-07T22:16:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"There's an invisible car outside with it's lights on."

Here are the leftovers...

I'll have a Kryptonite and soda.

There's a star covered red and yellow multi-wheeled vehicle blocking my car.

Sorry, I thought this was a secret identity bar.

Here are this week's nominees...

“I wish I could help you, but I'm a real-estate lawyer.”
Submitted by Tricia Bacon
Alexandria, Va.

“I know this seems weird, but even as a cub I could feel the rush of Wall Street racing through my veins.”
Submitted by James C. Czumak
Merritt Island, Fla.

“If you can't eat 'em, join 'em.”
Submitted by Arthur M. Rogers, Jr.
Lake Wales, Fla.

I entered...

"It hasn't been easy adapting to life outside."

this Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-12-02T23:25:00.001-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Did I miss anything while I was napping?"

Here are the leftovers...

How are those mustache reports coming?

I want to talk to you about the dress code.

It's not a mustache, it's more of a wantstache.

This week's nominees...

"He was a terrible pet—why did we think he'd make a great coffee table?"
Submitted by Rob Mariani
Bristol, R.I.

"When it's an elephant, we'll talk."
Submitted by Arun Nalkara
Orland Park, Ill.

"When's the last time you charged a man who looked at me?"
Submitted by Ann Linde
Eugene, Ore.

I entered...

"While you're out could you pick up some more giant white marbles?"

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-11-21T10:11:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"It hasn't been easy adapting to life outside."

Here are the left overs...

I'm now president of the jungle.

Don't blow my cover, I'm almost out of here.

If you wanted a better lawyer you should have hired a rat.

Here are this week's nominees...

"Regime change is never easy, dear."
Submitted by Gregory Malloy
East Sandwich, Mass.

"So much for starting over in a new city."
Submitted by Ronald Eomurian
Long Beach, Calif.

"It says here, 'Assume the prone position and return enemy fire until such time as reinforcements arrive.' "
Submitted by Douglass Stinson
Encinitas, Calif.

I entered...
"Close the window there's a draft."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-11-14T10:23:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"While you're out could you pick up some more giant white marbles?"

Here are the leftovers

Now that we've dealt with the elephant in the room we have another issue.

Hardwood floors have only made the issue tolerable!

You said we can't get a "dog".

I miss the old coffee table.

Here are this week's nominees...

"I guess this explains last night."
Submitted by Jim Wolfe
New York, N.Y.

"Oh, come on, I wasn't screaming at you."
Submitted by Bram Kleppner
Burlington, Vt.

"Wake up! You're missing the worst part."
Submitted by Nevin Martell
Washington, D.C.

I also entered...

"Wake up, you're missing the worst part!"

this Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-11-08T20:34:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Close the window there's a draft."

Here are this week's nominees...

“You're gonna have to roll me outta here.”
Submitted by Everett Hartwell
Berkeley, Calif.

“I'd kill for some cream cheese.”
Submitted by Joe Balding
Athens, Ohio

“I think you just ate the spare.”
Submitted by Andrew Pagoulatos
Blairstown, N.J.

I entered...

"This is the greatest invention in our police force's history."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-11-03T20:04:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Wake up, you're missing the worst part!"

Here are the leftovers...

You always have to different!

I fell asleep at the Ballet one time! ONE TIME!

Here are this week's nominees...

"That lady's shoes kind of remind me of Joey."
Submitted by Andy Crown
Los Angeles, Calif.

"I still say the sewers are quicker."
Submitted by Howard Lewis Russell
Dallas, Texas

"Anyone care to join us for lunch?"
Submitted by Sara Joshel
Lake Oswego, Ore.

I entered...
"We'll have to tell the other sewer monsters about this!"

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-10-24T14:47:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"This is the greatest invention in our police force's history."

Here's the leftovers...

These are much better than all those lightbulbs we ate.

Maybe we should just eat our mistakes.

Here's this weeks nominees...

"Honey, there's a sale on scarecrows."
Submitted by Peter Adair
Westminster West, Vt.

"If you do the dishes, I'll dust the crops."
Submitted by Craig MacInnis
Toronto, Ont.

"Well, you were right, dear. It does hide that stain in the carpet."
Submitted by Matthew Giamporcaro
Leesburg, Va.

I entered...

"Can you believe it's been 10 years since we got stuck in this maze?"

this Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-10-20T21:19:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"We'll have to tell the other sewer monsters about this!"

Here are the leftovers...

This is much better than traveling by sewer.

The city has really changed in the last 65 million years.

Did you see Sharks and the City last night?

Thought they didn't allow food on the subway.

Here are this week's nominees...

"O.K., who moved his cheese?"
Submitted by David Lusk
Chesterfield, Mich.

"Quickly—now release the giant cat!"
Submitted by Curt Horvath
Wilmette, Ill.

"Head for the maze!"
Submitted by Curtis McClurkin
New Bedford, Mass.

I entered...
"It works! Ship it to the NFL!"

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-10-10T20:54:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Can you believe it's been 10 years since we got stuck in this maze?"

Here are the leftovers...

Does our carpet look too corny?

We have to shampoo the carpet.

If you build it they will lounge.

This isn't what I thought you meant when you said you were getting corn rows.

Field of Attainable Goals.

Here are this week's nominees....

"I'm gonna go ahead and reheat last night's casserole."
Submitted by Kathryn Willingham
New York, N.Y.

"Let me know if the massacre is running late."
Submitted by George Gerding
Portland, Ore.

"It's just crabgrass, dear."
Submitted by Noel Hager
Albuquerque, N.M.

I entered...

"Have fun fishing."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-10-04T08:37:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"It works! Ship it to the NFL!"

Here are this week's nominees....

"Who has the time anymore? Now it just sits there, gathering dust."
Submitted by James Clements
Culpeper, Va.

"When we drink wines from Spain, we replace it with the rack."
Submitted by Andy Van Horn
Orinda, Calif.

"It's been in the family since 1789."
Submitted by Susan G. Thompson
Woodbridge, Va.

I entered...

Anyone want cake?

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-09-27T09:47:00.001-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Have fun fishing."

Here are the leftovers...

I know you only go out there to drink.

Could you at least try telling them to turn down the music first?

Have fun at Murder Camp.

I saw the mouse behind the garage.

You shouldn't have let the lawn go for so long.

Here's this week's nominees...

"I'll be rapping my presentation."
Submitted by Brandon Lawniczak
Chicago, Ill.

"Prison made him reassess his priorities."
Submitted by Jeffrey Ainis
Monrovia, Calif.

"The acoustics were better in the old boardroom."
Submitted by Stephen Laczniak
Mequon, Wis.

I entered...

"You have to admit, he sings a good point."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-09-21T11:04:00.001-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

Anyone want cake?

Here are the leftovers...

Who says you can't build a better mouse trap?

Don't worry, it's not what you think, we use it to cut off heads.

Keeps the baby from going near the electrical outlets.

Here are this week's nominees...

"It seems a bit extreme, but it does keep the zombies away."
Submitted by Nathan Paxton
Washington, D.C.

"I dare anyone to say we missed a spot."
Submitted by Virginia Nailling
Austin, Texas

"Looks like they’re making cuts at the top."
Submitted by David Woodbridge
Lake Forest, Ill.

I entered...

"The enchanted mannequins return every morning at sunrise."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-09-12T12:31:00.001-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"You have to admit, he sings a good point."

Here are the leftovers...

He preforms for stock tips.

Here are this week's nominees...

"There is one more thing we could try."
Submitted by Rob Huffman
Fredericksburg, Va.

"Keep it up."
Submitted by Charlie Pearson
Fairfax, Calif.

"The procedure is completely reversible."
Submitted by Steve Attoe
Calgary, Alta.

I entered...
"Have you considered a dimmer switch?"

this week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-09-05T20:27:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"The enchanted mannequins return every morning at sunrise."

Here are the leftovers...

"Here come the suits" is what most people would say, but I'm way too funny a janitor to say that.

The people running this company have their heads up their asses.

Here come the emperors new executives.

Here's this weeks nominees...

"Maybe this explains why we never had children."
Submitted by Tyler Burnett
San Antonio, Texas

"You knew I was a columnist when you married me."
Submitted by Laurissa James
New York, N.Y.

"This game looked a lot easier in the store."
Submitted by Jeffrey Hutchins
Black Mountain, N.C.

I entered...

"Let's just spill something on the carpet and get it over with."

this week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-08-30T21:32:00.001-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Have you considered a dimmer switch?"

Here are the leftovers...

This should help you turn your brain off before bed.

Be sure to have it in the off position before watching television.

I would avoid surgery and recommend a large novelty hat.

Here's this week's nominees...

"O.K., we learned a lot this game, including you can't rush a soufflé."
Submitted by Jay Solomon
New York, N.Y.

"First base wants to know if you have anything gluten-free."
Submitted by Michael Hicks
New Orleans, La.

"I trust you know what to do when you get to the plate."
Submitted by Phil Rosenthal
Chicago, Ill.

I entered...
"The idea behind new uniforms was that we'd all wear the SAME new uniforms."

This week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-08-22T22:18:00.001-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Let's just spill something on the carpet and get it over with."

Here's the leftovers...

Can't we just put plastic on the furniture?

We could just take our shoes off on the carpet.

This week's nominees...

"Want to play the license-plate game again?"
Submitted by David Franta
Cincinnati, Ohio

"Is it so important that it be a rescue ship?"
Submitted by Eric Behrens
Austin, Texas

"So I see you went with the grass interior."
Submitted by Jeffrey Kechejian
Bridgeport, Conn.

I entered...

"I remember when this was all swampland."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-08-14T11:10:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"The idea behind new uniforms was that we'd all wear the SAME new uniforms."

Here are the leftovers...

Alright serve them up something good.

Okay chief you up next, then you chief, then you chef.

Hit the showers chef, you're crab cakes are uninspired.

Here are this week's nominees...

"You know I'll just go straight to your hips."
Submitted by Blake Chapman
Toronto, Ont.

"We're sorry about your cat, but he was eating the slower children."
Submitted by Steven Woof
Aventura, Fla.

"You’re gonna be huge in this town."
Submitted by David Wilson
Morristown, N.J.

I entered...

"Please spare my boobs, I mean life!"

this Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-08-02T19:24:00.001-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"I remember when this was all swampland."

Here's the leftovers...

I wish I'd brought my favorite stop sign instead of this record.

They just ran over the bottle.

This island use to be so deserted.

This week's nominee...

"I finally bagged this monster after three days of bidding on eBay."
Submitted by Mike Harrington
Prairie Village, Kans.

"I only use this room when I'm sentimental for obliteration."
Submitted by Jamie Reynolds
Sisters, Ore.

"It put up quite a fight, but then it ran out of gas."
Submitted by John Blumenthal
Rye, N.Y.

I entered...

"These are extinct now."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-07-25T20:26:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Please spare my boobs, I mean life!"

Here are the leftovers...

Oh I get it, you're only interested in my car.

Here are this week's nominees...

"Maybe you can talk him down."
Submitted by Brandon Bart
Brooklyn, N.Y.

"Can I get you a cup of coffee and a pair of stilts?"
Submitted by Claire Stern
Newton, Mass.

"He's at the top now, but he still likes to claw his way there every morning."
Submitted by Ken Alexander
Culver City, Calif.

I entered...
"Word of advice, don't mention his enormous shins."

this Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-07-18T13:57:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"These are extinct now."

Here are the leftovers...

It was "Friendly Fire", but what the heck.

You'd be amazed what a handgun can stop now days.

Can you believe the steroids deer are on these days?

Here are this week's nominees...

"Performance art eludes me."
Submitted by Rita Rancken
Austin, Texas

"I've changed my mind, Frank. The pool should be over there."
Submitted by Jonathon J. Pepper
New York, N.Y.

"One more, and we are officially lunatics."
Submitted by Jeff D'Onofrio
Wilton, Conn.

I entered...

"On second thought let's put the pool by the tree."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-07-04T16:51:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Word of advice, don't mention his enormous shins."

Here are the leftovers...

Make yourself uncomfortable.

Here are this week's nominees...

"We never should have sold those air rights, Ed."
Submitted by Jim Kenney
Glendale, N.Y.

"Oh, look. The Nelsons have their own gravity now."
Submitted by James Hawes
Huntington Beach, Calif.

"Looks like they're ready to be flipped, Bob."
Submitted by Dylan White
Toronto, Ont.

I entered...

"So that's what life would've been like if I'd gotten that perm."

Sexy Dan Scanlon

2011-07-02T14:13:00.000-07:00

For my birthday Michele got me this great painting by story artist Josh Cooley . It's based on a very disturbing Halloween costume idea Michele had. She was tired of every girl dressing up as a "Sexy Nurse", "Sexy School Girl" and "Sexy Big Bird" that she decided next year she wants to dress up as a "Sexy" version of me.

I wear pretty much the same type of clothes every day: baseball cap, plaid western shirt,brown corduroy pants, and black tennis shoes.

So behold the Freudian nightmare that is, this years run away Halloween costume, "Sexy Dan Scanlon".

Josh has a series of "girlie" playing cards done in this same style available by clicking here.

this Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-06-26T21:04:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"On second thought let's put the pool by the tree."

Here's the leftovers...

Nasa wants this moon landing to look perfect.

Do you remember the last time you saw your cars key?

I said giant squares!

Here's this week's nominees...

"Didn't you retire ages ago?"
Submitted by Connor Ryan
Salem, Mass.

"Let's walk him and pitch to the bishop."
Submitted by Dov Cohen
Champaign, Ill.

"Surely you joust."
Submitted by Marianne Baker
Deception Pass, Wash.

I entered...

"These "throwback" uniforms have gone too far".

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-06-16T08:34:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"So that's what life would've been like if I'd gotten that perm."

Here's this week's nominees...

"First off, I'd like to apologize for the change in venue."
Submitted by Joan Mitchell
Arrington, Tenn.

"Let's stay positive. Who would like to start with what went right?"
Submitted by Jerry Franklin
Caledonia, Ill.

"Miriam, I pulled a lot of strings to get you in this meeting."
Submitted by Laurence K. Marks
Highland Park, Ill.

I entered...
"We've been acquired by Big Keith in cell block 2."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-06-06T08:53:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"These "throwback" uniforms have gone too far".

"Part of me thinks you should be seeing a veterinarian."
Submitted by Ronald McLeod
Nichols Hills, Okla.

"So you say you're only half the man you used to be?"
Submitted by Ron Eland
Waikoloa, Hawaii

"Frankly, your life sounds quite wonderful."
Submitted by Lisa Andrews
Brooklyn, N.Y.

I entered...

"Why do you feel your wife is always riding you?"

this week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-05-30T15:03:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"We've been acquired by Big Keith in cell block 2."

Here are the leftovers...

Our toilet wine profits are through the roof.

Here are this week's nominees...

"Hey, kids—you'll need to move over. Mr. Miller's car won't start."
Submitted by Joey Pipia
Port Townsend, Wash.

"Would you call the office and ask them to open my window?"
Submitted by Bill Wiggins
Red Boiling Springs, Tenn.

"It's a loaner."
Submitted by Jim Johnston
Bethesda, Md.

I entered...

"We've got room for one more in here."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-05-23T10:20:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Why do you feel your wife is always riding you?"

Here are the leftovers...

What makes you think you’re adopted?

For a horse-man you’re very unstable.

Here's this week's nominees...

"Don't just stand there, Agnes—get the pliers."
Submitted by Dorothy Lefkovits
San Francisco, Calif.

"It's for you."
Submitted by Debbie Meagher
Clearwater, Fla.

"Hello, I'm calling to report a giant hand in my house."
Submitted by Dan Woods
Akron, Ohio

I entered...

"I may be bald but you've really let yourself go Barbie."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-05-16T08:52:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"We've got room for one more in here."

Here are the leftovers...

Race you to work.

It's safer than morning traffic.

Want in on the car death pool?

Here are this week's nominees...

"It's a working vacation."
Submitted by Catherine Gibran
Barrington, R.I.

"You'll find we do things a little differently here in accounts swimmable."
Submitted by Stephan Cox
New York, N.Y.

"Can you please fold it into a little boat?"
Submitted by James Morley
Houston, Texas

I entered...

"Come on in the audits fine!"

this week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-05-08T21:11:00.000-07:00

*Sorry, Blogger was screwed up this week and deleted this post. I didn't realize it until just now.

"I may be bald but you've really let yourself go Barbie."

Here are the left overs...

Next phone I get is going to be hands free.

Here's this weeks nominees...

"I must find the tree that killed my father."
Submitted by Graham Watling
Brooklyn, N.Y.

"That one was asking for it."
Submitted by Ian Spain
Ann Arbor, Mich.

"I came, I sawed, I conquered."
Submitted by Juli Rodgers
Santa Fe, N.M.

I entered...
"This solar powered chainsaw is way better for the environment."

this Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-05-01T22:02:00.001-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Come on in the audits fine!"

Here are the leftovers...

I really want to hear your ideas, put them in with the others.

Here are this week's nominees...

"I'll have the chicken."
Submitted by Liam Kavanagh
Calgary, Alberta

"Give me a second—I know this one."
Submitted by Bezalel Stern
New York, N.Y.

"When they all walked in that day, I thought something seemed funny."
Submitted by Jim Johnson
New York, N.Y.

I entered...
"I'm not sure which three of them entered the bar?"

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-04-25T21:08:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"This solar powered chainsaw is way better for the environment."

Here are the leftovers...

Do we get Earth Day off this year?

Here are this weeks nominees...

"Your services are no longer required."
Submitted by Kevin Campbell
Auburn, Calif.

"O.K., where did you hide the remote?"
Submitted by Bill Craig
Ridgewood, N.J.

"It's time I told you—you were adapted."
Submitted by Bruce Cherry
New York, N.Y.

I entered...

"The internet must be stopped."

Tracy Fan Art

2011-04-12T20:51:00.000-07:00

Got our first Fan Art for our live action comedy "Tracy" from Illustrator Ryan Estrada. It's a drawing of the four TV Legends featured in the film.

Check out more of Ryan's work online!

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-04-12T20:19:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"The internet must be stopped."

Here are the leftovers...

Unless you're filled with porn you don't stand a chance against me.

Here are this week's nominees...

"Why don't you just admit it—this is the wrong desert."
Submitted by Ronn Koeppel
Los Osos, Calif.

"Let me know if you spot a divorce lawyer."
Submitted by Kent Engelmeier
Pittsburgh, Pa.

"I'm not going to say the word I'm thinking of."
Submitted by Roger Ebert
Chicago, Ill.

I entered...
"We are so F'd."

"Tracy" Episode 14: "Family Gathering"

2011-04-06T21:27:00.000-07:00

1970’s children’s show host Tracy Knapp was loved to death by a generation of kids, but killed to death by an unknown assailant. Follow filmmaker and fan Dan Sullivan on his journey to find out once and for all, who shot Tracy Knapp.

Episode 14
“Family Gathering”

Well that's it! Thanks everyone for watching. The whole movie will be online soon. Check www.tracymovie.com for news on when.

Thanks

Dan

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-04-04T18:46:00.001-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"So glad we were upgraded from 'Standby' to 'Cling To.' "

Here are the leftovers...

This is the safest seat Southwest has at the moment.

First class use to mean something.

Here are this week's nominees...

"The governor would like your help with the budget."
Submitted by Katie Scheir
Los Angeles, Calif.
"After they're shredded, I want them burned at the stake."
Submitted by Frank Sargent
Carlisle, Mass.
"They're saying the book is dead. I'd like to be sure."
Submitted by Gavin Powers
New York, N.Y.

I entered...
"Could you take the headers off these?"

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-04-01T08:37:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"We are so F'd."

Here's the leftovers...

This is the desert level, we parked on the ocean level!

If you had put the green tennis ball on the antenna this wouldn't have happened.

F you.

I'm telling you we took the bus here.

This is why I don't like taking the dune buggy.

Here's this week's nominees...

"Is that your foot?"
Submitted by Martha Robbins
Marietta, Ohio

"Should I call and downsize our pizza order?"
Submitted by J. Forrest Hobart
Easton, Pa.

"They're outside protesting, sir."
Submitted by Nando Pelusi
Brooklyn, N.Y.

I entered...

"Should we move to the big conference table?"

"Tracy" Episode 13: "The Convention"

2011-03-31T22:16:00.000-07:00

"Tracy" Episode 12: "Ferf"

2011-03-23T21:51:00.000-07:00

1970’s children’s show host Tracy Knapp was loved to death by a generation of kids, but killed to death by an unknown assailant. Follow filmmaker and fan Dan Sullivan on his journey to find out once and for all, who shot Tracy Knapp.

Episode 12
“Ferf”

The isolated woods of Michigan provide a disturbing setting for a shocking revelations.

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-03-21T17:39:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Could you take the headers off these?"

Here's the leftovers...

Want to read my screenplay?

Here's this week's nominees...

"I ran out of water, officer."
Submitted by Peter Nord
New York, N.Y.

"How 'bout I give you two of these salmon, you walk away, and no one's the wiser?"
Submitted by Mark Miller
Los Angeles, Calif.

"Where were you when I drove my car into the lake?"
Submitted by Michael McCarthy
Chevy Chase, Md.

I entered...

"I was trying to get away from the guy on the skis."

"Tracy" Episode 11: “Renaissance Men”

2011-03-17T21:47:00.000-07:00

1970’s children’s show host Tracy Knapp was loved to death by a generation of kids, but killed to death by an unknown assailant. Follow filmmaker and fan Dan Sullivan on his journey to find out once and for all, who shot Tracy Knapp.

Episode 11
“Renaissance Men”

After exposing their deepest, darkest secrets, the filmmaker and Jim Knapp let down their guard and draw up their swords.

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-03-14T09:32:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Should we move to the big conference table?"

Here's the leftovers...

Here are this week's nominees...

"It would be so easy to flip this house."
Submitted by Tom Tykodi
New Albany, Ohio

"The owners are willing to throw in shock absorbers."
Submitted by Robert Turner
Carlsbad, Calif.

"It's available. The other buyers dropped off."
Submitted by Will Gibson
Washington, D.C.

I entered...

"The basement is unfinished."

"Tracy" Deleted Scene!

2011-03-13T15:43:00.000-07:00

Hey all,

Thought I'd post one of the few deleted scenes from our web-series TRACY this week.

This clip was originally made for the moment in this week's episode (click here to see) where the filmmaker talks about his claymation series called "The Fwebick." I shot this version first and then my wife and producer Michele Scanlon suggested that we do something with a little more action, and we came up with the version that's in the film now. But I still think there is a simple charm to this incredibly boring Fwebicks clip.

Tracy" Deleted Scene #1: The Fwebicks "Cable Caper - watch more funny videos

By the way I really did make claymation movies about the Fwebicks in the past, but I was 9 years old, instead of 27.

Enjoy, and watch out for Episode 11 of "Tracy" this Thursday night entitled "Renaissance Men".

Dan

"Tracy" Episode 10: "The Apology"

2011-03-09T21:08:00.000-08:00

1970’s children’s show host Tracy Knapp was loved to death by a generation of kids, but killed to death by an unknown assailant. Follow filmmaker and fan Dan Sullivan on his journey to find out once and for all, who shot Tracy Knapp.

Episode 10
“The Apology”

Feeling bad about his conduct, the filmmaker offers up his own dignity to win back the trust, confidence, and respect of his subject, and friend.

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-03-06T21:19:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"I was trying to get away from the guy on the skis."

Here's the leftovers...

I'm a little lost.

Have you been following me since the lake?

I'm in international waters.

Here's this week's nominees...

"Relax. The DVR is set. You can catch the game tomorrow."
Submitted by Mary Troy
Goshen, N.Y.

"I don't want you to be the one that got away."
Submitted by Robert MacGougan
Toronto, Ont.

"I don't want to creep you out or anything, but I'm your biggest fan."
Submitted by William Bendix
Vancouver, B.C.

I entered...
"You've got a little spaghetti on your shirt."

"Tracy" Episode 9: "Positive Reinforcements"

2011-03-03T22:33:00.000-08:00

1970’s children’s show host Tracy Knapp was loved to death by a generation of kids, but killed to death by an unknown assailant. Follow filmmaker and fan Dan Sullivan on his journey to find out once and for all, who shot Tracy Knapp.

Episode 9
“Positive Reinforcements”

Just when all is lost, the children that grew up loving Tracy Knapp finally grow up, and have kids of their own.

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-03-02T09:55:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"The basement is unfinished."

Here's the leftovers...

It has a spacious backyard.

You're gonna want to move on this house fast, it's gonna be off the market soon.

There's one more in your price range, but it's already in the ocean.

Here's this week's nominees...

"Wake up, Harold! You're having another of your delusions of grandeur."
Submitted by Judy Keith
Lutz, Fla.

"Swift justice or cold pancakes? It's your call, honey."
Submitted by Scott Otteman
Washington, D.C.

"I hate it when you bring work home."
Submitted by Myrna Petlicki
Skokie, Ill.

I entered...

"Do you mind? I'm trying to watch Judge Judy."

"Tracy" Episode 8: "The Secret Life of Jim Knapp"

2011-02-24T21:32:00.000-08:00

1970’s children’s show host Tracy Knapp was loved to death by a generation of kids, but killed to death by an unknown assailant. Follow filmmaker and fan Dan Sullivan on his journey to find out once and for all, who shot Tracy Knapp.

The filmmaker confronts Jim Knapp to find out what he’s hiding, no matter how shocking, painful, or irrelevant.

Episode 8
“The Secret Life of Jim Knapp”

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-02-20T21:14:00.001-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"You've got a little spaghetti on your shirt."

Here are this weeks nominees...

"The guy you're looking for waltzed out of here an hour ago."
Submitted by Ed Ridgley
Phenix City, Ala.

"How is she on the pole?"
Submitted by Paul Brandis
Olympia, Wash.

"Honest to God, Joe, she's the best bouncer I've ever hired."
Submitted by John Turtz
Larchmont, N.Y.

I entered...

"That’s not the type of dancer we’re looking for."

"Tracy" Episode 7: "Broken Home"

2011-02-16T21:03:00.000-08:00

1970’s children’s show host Tracy Knapp was loved to death by a generation of kids, but killed to death by an unknown assailant. Follow filmmaker and fan Dan Sullivan on his journey to find out once and for all, who shot Tracy Knapp.

Episode 7
“Broken Home”

Tracy loses his show,his fans, his hair, and his family.

"Tracy" Episode 6: "Train Leaves the Station"

2011-02-10T22:23:00.000-08:00

1970’s children’s show host Tracy Knapp was loved to death by a generation of kids, but killed to death by an unknown assailant. Follow filmmaker and fan Dan Sullivan on his journey to find out once and for all, who shot Tracy Knapp.

Episode 6
“The Train Leaves the Station”

Though a generation of kids adore Tracy, a more relevant generation of parents hate him, causing Tracy to lose everything.

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-02-06T21:20:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Do you mind? I'm trying to watch Judge Judy."

Here are the leftovers...

Okay, I think the judge is on our side now.

Keep it down up there, some of us are trying to do Crystal Meth.

Here are this week's nominees...

"Wanna build a snow tyrannosaurus?"
Submitted by Joseph Costanzo
Staten Island, N.Y.

"I don't mean to be alarmist, but these things usually travel in groups."
Submitted by Elizabeth Baker
Los Angeles, Calif.

"It's probably about time to take down the holiday decorations, honey."
Submitted by R. B. Niles
New York, N.Y.

I entered...

"Thank God no two are alike."

"Tracy" Episode 5: "Behind Closed Doors"

2011-02-03T21:45:00.000-08:00

1970’s children’s show host Tracy Knapp was loved to death by a generation of kids, but killed to death by an unknown assailant. Follow filmmaker and fan Dan Sullivan on his journey to find out once and for all, who shot Tracy Knapp.

Episode 5
“Behind Closed Doors”

The filmmaker discovers that Tracy’s son and former ex-wife are hiding a closet full of skeletons and other stupid stuff.

Tracy" Episode 5: "Behind Closed Doors - watch more funny videos

****** Oh, and by the way. If you're enjoying "Tracy" check out a review of the entire film by Alesha Noice at Beyond Feedback by clicking here.

Also check out www.tracymovie.com Thursday night, for next week's episode called, "“The Train Leaves the Station”

This week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-02-01T21:30:00.001-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"That’s not the type of dancer we’re looking for."

Here's the leftovers

You really should tip the Ballet parking attendant.

Here's the nominees...

"I think we made a wrong turn at puberty."
Submitted by David Baucus
Louisville, Ky.

"More legroom than I would have guessed."
Submitted by Bruce Cole
Wichita, Kans.

"I'm pregnant."
Submitted by Pete Gagliano
Chicago, Ill.

I entered...

"I think it's time to give up on reverse psychology."

"Tracy" Episode 4: "Clown-troversy"

2011-01-26T21:39:00.000-08:00

1970’s children’s show host Tracy Knapp was loved to death by a generation of kids, but killed to death by an unknown assailant. Follow filmmaker and fan Dan Sullivan on his journey to find out once and for all, who shot Tracy Knapp.

Episode 4
“Clown-troversy”

How was this lovable clown’s message that all children are infallibly correct no matter what they say or do twisted into a bad thing?

Tracy" Episode 4: "Clown-troversy - watch more funny videos

This week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-01-24T16:25:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Thank God no two are alike."

Here's the leftover...

I made this snow flake out of like a million little snow flakes.

I don't think we're gonna have school tomorrow.

Here's this weeks nominees...

"Remember, it's all in the timing."
Submitted by Carol McGaughey
Dallas, Texas

"Watch out for banana peels on the way down."
Submitted by Lisa Radisay
Brooklyn, N.Y.

"Stop me if you've heard these before."
Submitted by Susan Thaler
West Haven, Conn.

I entered...

"I did a quick gag pass."

"Tracy" Episode 3: "Birth of a Clown"

2011-01-19T19:56:00.000-08:00

1970’s children’s show host Tracy Knapp was loved to death by a generation of kids, but killed to death by an unknown assailant. Follow filmmaker and fan Dan Sullivan on his journey to find out once and for all, who shot Tracy Knapp.

Episode 3
“Birth of a Clown”
A clown at heart Tracy left the family business to entertain the children of the world, and piss-off their parents.

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-01-16T22:21:00.001-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"I think it's time to give up on reverse psychology."

Here's the leftovers...

How about the kids sit in the back after the next stop?

Here's this week's nominees...

"I have to say, I'm not a big fan of cloud computing."
Submitted by Ben Hahn
Somerville, Mass.

"I'll be there in ten thousand feet."
Submitted by Vanessa Southern
Maplewood, N.J.

"I guess you could call me an adventure capitalist."
Submitted by Matthew Collins
Cincinnati, Ohio

I entered...

"I'm trying to catch another flight right now."

"Tracy" Episode 2: "You Can't Please Everyone"

2011-01-12T22:31:00.000-08:00

1970’s children’s show host Tracy Knapp was loved to death by a generation of kids, but killed to death by an unknown assailant. Follow filmmaker and fan Dan Sullivan on his journey to find out once and for all, who shot Tracy Knapp.

Episode 2
“You Can't Please Everyone.”
Jim Knapp maybe the son of a loving, generous 1970's children show host, but he's going to prove he's nothing like his dad.

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-01-09T21:16:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"I did a quick gag pass."

Here are the leftovers...

Pull my commandments.

Here are this week's nominees....

"I didn't get where I am by trying to please."
Submitted by Marianne Whitlock
Kennett Square, Pa.

"This department has become loyal to a fault."
Submitted by James Kelley
Whispering Pines, N.C.

"Let's keep this brief. I've got to get back to staring out the window."
Submitted by Moshe David
Brooklyn, N.Y.

I entered...

"This takeover is going to lead to a few personnel changes."

We Made a Video Today!

2011-01-08T16:59:00.001-08:00

Michele and I made a video today! Want to see it? It's called "Holding Hands".

Holding Hands - watch more funny videos

"Tracy" Episode 1: "The Life and Death of Tracy Knapp"

2011-01-06T21:36:00.000-08:00

1970’s children’s show host Tracy Knapp was loved to death by a generation of kids, but killed to death by an unknown assailant. Follow filmmaker and fan Dan Sullivan on his journey to find out once and for all, who shot Tracy Knapp.

Ep 1
“Life and Death of Tracy Knapp”
Filmmaker and fan Dan Sullivan sets out to find the shooter of his childhood hero, children’s show host Tracy Knapp.

Episode 1 âLife and Death of Tracy Knappâ - watch more funny videos

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2011-01-02T21:16:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"I'm trying to catch another flight right now."

Here are the leftovers...

This paralegal-chute really comes in handy.

I had to step outside to take this call.

I'm gonna be a few minutes late to the meeting.

Things at the office are a little crazy right now.

I figured out a way to shorten my commute.

Here are this week's nominees...

"I won’t have what he's having."
Submitted by Ed Gross
Westwood, N.J.

"My wife just calls me on my cell phone."
Submitted by Karen Rosner
White Plains, N.Y.

"That's one heck of a wet willy."
Submitted by Karen Fiorino
Makanda, Ill.

I entered...

"He's a coach for the WNBA."

Tracy's Internet Debut Next Week!

2010-12-30T23:44:00.000-08:00

Thursday January 6th the first episode of our web series "Tracy" will debut at www.tracymovie.com! Tracy was originally shot as a stand alone feature film, but will debut online over the course of the next three months as an online web series. Please check out the trailer below and if you like it be sure to check into www.tracymovie.com Thursday night January 6th!

this Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-12-26T23:25:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"This takeover is going to lead to a few personnel changes."

Here are the leftovers...

Gentlemen, there is a rat amongst us.

This year's annual report is in, "Good Dogs."

Alright, which one of you called me a pussy?

We're the reining cats and dogs.

You'll have to speak up.*

* (To get why this is funny see this week's nominees...)

Here are this week's nominees...

"And some fresh flowers for the table."
Submitted by Barbara Milewski
Easton, Pa.

"Separate checks, please."
Submitted by Cecilia Hogan
Tacoma, Wash.

* "You'll have to speak up."
Submitted by Kim Friese
Westlake, Ore.

I entered...

"I'm allergic to peanut sauces, I breakout in hives."

* (Huh, that's weird, it's not funny in either situation. Strange that it was picked as a nominee this week.)

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-12-12T21:27:00.001-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"He's a coach for the WNBA."

Here are the leftovers...

You can't hide from the long arm of the in-law.

She likes him to stay within reach.

Here are this week's nominees...

"There's a warm front coming through this afternoon."
Submitted by Van White
Anaheim, Calif.

"Careful, the water’s hard today."
Submitted by Don Symons
Santa Barbara, Calif.

"I started last summer when this was a pool."
Submitted by Lawrence Wackerman
Hicksville, N.Y.

I entered...

"How long have I been asleep up here?"

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-12-05T21:18:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"I'm allergic to peanut sauces, I breakout in hives."

Here are the leftovers...

This restaurant is getting great buzz.

I hear the bees hear are killer.

Does that have honey in it.

Here's this weeks nominees...

"The specials are coming out a little greasy."
Submitted by Mitch Wesley
Hamilton, Ohio

"I have a request to see how the sausage is made."
Submitted by Walter Giles
Montclair, N.J.

"They only want the starter."
Submitted by Rosalind Sadleir
Gainesville, Fla.

I entered...

"Table two found a fly in their coupe."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-11-28T21:30:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"How long have I been asleep up here?"

Here's the leftovers...

Call everyone in, Tonya Harding is on the ice!

Here's this week's nominees...

"The boss is a security nut."
Submitted by Walter Beam
Chester, Va.

"I think we've been downsized."
Submitted by Mindy Utay
New York, N.Y.

"Corporate is working on a key.”
Submitted by Robbie Mantel
Philadelphia, Pa.

I entered...

"We can go in now the giant sock is gone."

this Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-11-21T21:13:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Table two found a fly in their coupe."

Here are the leftovers...

Table nine said their food is too greasy.

Come on guys, we need that pizza delivered now!

You’re going to have to work harder than that to win “American’s Top Car Engineer Who likes to Dress like a Chef!”

Here are this week's nominees...

"Now don't you wish you hadn't done so many helium shots?"
Submitted by Edward Wierenga
Rochester, N.Y.

"You're such a light sleeper."
Submitted by Stephen Domesick
Lake Worth, Fla.

"You need to cut your toenails."
Submitted by Sean Farrell
Los Angeles, Calif.

I entered...
"Okay, so my feet are a little cold."

this Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-11-14T21:32:00.001-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"We can go in now the giant sock is gone."

Here are the leftovers...

Darn, I left my keys in my airplane hanger.

The former owners were exhibitionist.

We’re being downsized.

It’s impossible to get in the door at this company.

Here's this weeks nominees...

“I couldn't find the three-hole punch.”
Submitted by Brian Wherrett
Ottawa, Ont.

“Ring toss at noon?”
Submitted by Myles Hollander
Tallahassee, Fla.

“Your three-o'clock hallucination is here.”
Submitted by Daniel Clarke
Sechelt, B.C.

I entered...

"Your 2:30 daydream is here."

(I was just a half-hour off of being nominated!)

this Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-11-07T22:45:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Okay, so my feet are a little cold."

Here are the leftovers...

Did you have another nocturnal ignition?

Fine, I'll cut my toenails.

Am I keeping you up.

Can't go to sleep?

Here are this week's nominees...

"Hey, move, you're blocking out the sun."
Submitted by Gordon Martz
Fayetteville, Ark.

"Psst. You want to buy an alligator?"
Submitted by John Curran
Fairfield, Conn.

"Get a big stick with a giant wad of gum and get me out of here."
Submitted by Robert Malina
Los Angeles, Calif.

I entered...

"You think you're better than me just cause you're not in the sewer?"

This Week's Caption Contest

2010-11-02T18:23:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Your 2:30 daydream is here."

Here's this weeks nominees...

"Can I interest you in opening an offshore account?"
Submitted by Michael Demma
Valencia, Calif.

"Have you considered burying your treasure?"
Submitted by Sam Mowe
Brooklyn, N.Y.

"It's in keeping with our new transparency policy."
Submitted by Roxanne Mayweather
Los Angeles, Calif.

I entered...

"Welcome to Mutiny of Omaha."

This week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-10-24T21:34:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"You think you're better than me just cause you're not in the sewer?"

Here's the leftovers.

Hey, I don't spit my gum in your house.

I saw that, you just picked your butt!

Here's this week's nominees...

"This is our worst carjacking ever."
Submitted by Mordechai Lichtenstein
New York, N.Y.

"Try honking again."
Submitted by Lawrence Wood
Chicago, Ill.

"A lot of pizzas are going to be free today."
Submitted by George Cinert
Bolingbrook, Ill.

I entered...

"Would you mind passing me that empty coffee cup?"

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-10-19T20:17:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Welcome to Mutiny of Omaha."

Here are the leftovers...

Arrr...you sure you don't want to open a savings account?

Polly wants to see two forms of ID.

I suggest you put half of the money in checking and the other half in an extravagantly bejewelled chest buried on a desert island?

Here are this week's nominees...

"Anyone have an objection? Please? Anyone?"
Submitted by Miriam Lichtenstein
Bala Cynwyd, Pa.

"Now, at the actual wedding tomorrow, let's keep Heather off the vodka."
Submitted by Mike McGonegal
Burlington, Vt.

"Brittany, I understand you've written Kyle's vows, which he'll now read."
Submitted by Rob Huffman
Fredericksburg, Va.

I entered...

"Let's save that for tonight, okay?"

this Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-10-10T21:34:00.001-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Would you mind passing me that empty coffee cup?"

Here's the leftovers...

Have I told you how Scientology changed my life?

We never talk now that I'm dating your ex-wife.

Looks like everybody's wife is also delivering a baby right now.

Boy, Indian food really stays with you.

It's a one man show about my relationship with my father and it goes like this...

Here's this weeks nominees...

"We knew that using the sperm bank might be a gamble."
Submitted by Lynn Menashian
Pacific Grove, Calif.

"Hey, at least it swims like a duck."
Submitted by Jon Greene
Great Barrington, Mass.

"Just wait until you see his wingtips."
Submitted by Thomas McGowan
Kildeer, Ill.

I entered...

"I don't want you hanging around the farmer's house anymore. "

Let the Right One Get Married So Long

2010-10-08T23:57:00.000-07:00

I saw these three poster next to each other a few years ago, and thought this was a little like when two ladies wear the same dress to the oscars. So embarrassing.

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-10-03T21:30:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Let's save that for tonight, okay?"

Here are the leftovers...

Do you Rob, take this woman where ever she wants?

Is that a groom in your dress or are you just happy to see me?

I now pronounce you half man half wife.

Here's this week's nominees...

"Sorry I'm late. I had to give the boss a ride home."
Submitted by Larry Weissman
White Plains, N.Y.

"Horsey, I'm home."
Submitted by Joel Bernstein
New York, N.Y.

"It's raining cat-dogs out there."
Submitted by Mary Lynch
New York, N.Y.

I entered the very similar...

"It's raining cats that are also dogs out there."

this Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-09-26T21:16:00.001-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"I don't want you hanging around the farmer's house anymore. "

Here are the leftovers...

The narcotic duckling is back.

I think it’s time we tell the other ducklings they’re adopted.

He's the duckling with the good personality.

Here are this weeks nominees...

"I gather you both feel you're being manipulated."
Submitted by John Glenn
Tyler, Texas

"O.K., now do a tragedy."
Submitted by Andrew Badr
Oakland, Calif.

"You need an agent, not a counsellor."
Submitted by Joe Wehry
Astoria, New York

I entered...

"Have you considered how this is going to effect the kid’s puppets?"

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-09-19T21:25:00.001-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"It's raining cats that are also dogs out there."

Here are the leftovers...

I don't want to hear it you old nag.

My boss has turned into a total ass.

Here's this weeks nominees...

"Yes, I'm alone."
Submitted by Kevin Duval
Baltimore, Md.

"Never thought I’d say this, but I wish I'd played more Whac-A-Mole as a kid."
Submitted by Steven Seifert
Albuquerque, N.M.

"I'm on a satellite phone—how's the reception?"
Submitted by Curt Horvath
Wilmette, Ill.

"Can you hear me now?"

The New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-09-12T21:25:00.001-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Have you considered how this is going to effect the kid’s puppets?"

Here are the leftovers...

Have you ever tried talking about your feelings through your puppeteers?

You’re both putting on quite a show.

You’re acting like children.

Don’t forget why you decided to Marry Annette. Get it, Marionette? Cause you’re both puppets.

I want to start seeing your puppeteers.

I want to see both of you again, this Saturday at my son’s birthday party.

Try to stay together for the kids toys.

Here this week's nominees...

"You don't have to tell me it's a vanishing breed."
Submitted by Thomas Collins
Yorkville, N.Y.

"You always have to be an early adopter."
Submitted by Richard Gage
Royal Oak, Mich.

"In the end, Ed, most of us are carried along by our delusions."
Submitted by Anne O'Reilly
Watertown, Mass.

I entered...

"Is that one of them newfangled horse-less,carriage-less,carriages?"

The Indescribable Nth

2010-09-12T00:22:00.000-07:00

My first professional animation job was a short film by Steve (Oscar) Moore, produced by "Character Builders" in Columbus Ohio called "The indescribable Nth".

It's a deceptively simple, beautiful little film about love, and I learned so much from this project. I was a struggling clean up artist finishing my final year in art school in Columbus Ohio when I learned of this project. The film had been on hold for a few years when Steve allowed me to practice my animation skills on a few shots. I had a great time practicing on this film on weekends, and I took as many shots as they'd give me. Because of the work I did on this short "Character Builders" took me off clean up and moved me to animation, and eventually story. I'm pretty certain I would have been fired after a few weeks as a clean up artist if this opportunity hadn't come up.

I left Character Builders and Columbus to try to find work in California, and if Steve hadn't attended a party for Joe Grant, and talked to Joe Ranft I wouldn't have the job I have today, which coincidently I got 9 years ago on Sept 10th.

So please, take a few minutes to check out this beautiful little film...and check out Steve's great online animation magazine called "Flip".

The Indescribable Nth from Steve Moore on Vimeo.

Dan

this Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-09-05T23:44:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Can you hear me now?"

Here's the leftovers...

Hold on, I'm going under a black hole.

Hey go outside and look at the moon right now.

We never do anything where I live.

Houston we have a boner.

Here's this week's nominees...

"Call security and tell them to circle the wagons!"
Submitted by Shirley Quick
Wichita, Kans.

"Looks like I'm going to have to cancel my High Noon."
Submitted by Dan Walker
Oregon, Wis.

"Quick, give them a casino."
Submitted by Deron Grabel
Naugatuck, Conn.

I entered...

"Gary's back, and he's shooting up the Halloween party!"

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-08-30T21:36:00.001-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Is that one of them newfangled horse-less,carriage-less,carriages?"

Here are the leftovers...

Careful, there's horse thieves around here.

Your horse needs to get back in the saddle again.

Here's this weeks nominees...

"He's been sitting there since the French Revolution."
Submitted by Mark Hersh
Chicago, Ill.

"Makes you want to think twice before donating body parts."
Submitted by Stephen Rangen
Los Angeles, Calif.

"So they have empty suits up here, too."
Submitted by Larry Rafferty
Kensington, Calif.

I entered...

"They don’t tell you what else happens when a bell rings."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-08-26T19:54:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Gary's back, and he's shooting up the Halloween party!"

Here's the leftovers...

I'm sorry, you just missed him.

Could you please hold all my close calls.

Turns out it isn't better to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune!

Here's this nominees...

"This may burn a little."
Submitted by Paul Wehling
Minneapolis, Minn.

"I'm beginning to see what you mean."
Submitted by Lucinda Olmstead
Loudonville, N.Y.

"Now, if you wouldn't mind holding on to this while I get the thermometer."
Submitted by Catherine Cameron
Fallbrook, Calif.

I entered...

"Is this lens better or worse?"

MacLon Industries

2010-08-21T22:47:00.000-07:00

I spent last weekend in Vegas for my cousin Brian's bachelor party. We dressed up like mid-western salesmen representing a fictional company called MacLon Industries, a combination of both cousins last names MacLean and Scanlon.

I grew a mustache and looked 5 years older, 15 pounds heavier and 20 times more religious.

Here I am on the first night party at Margarettaville. Don't want to go too crazy, we've got a big sales presentation in the morning, not to mention the big convention!

The next day my brother and fellow sales rep for Maclon Inc. and I ate a "Burger King" to get our energy up and then hit the strip.

After the presentation we rewarded the crew with cocktails and sun bathing by the pool.

Here I am networking with some real "out of the box" thinking young salesmen. "I'm sold!"

Met up with the rest of the Maclon Inc. crew later that afternoon. Hide your wallets, this sales crew is on the prowl, and they won't take wholesale for an answer!

Oh snap! This party just got turn up a notch!

Oops, we missed the convection by 6 hours, but we made some real relevant connections. Time to go home and watch "Ocean's 11" on TNT's "Movies for Guys", eat a "Wendy's" and fall asleep in the bathtub!

Maclon Industries - "If you're in business, we're in business."

Tracy Screening in Burbank!

2010-08-20T21:25:00.000-07:00

Our first feature film, "Tracy" is screening Sunday September 12th at 10:30 AM at AMC Burbank Town Center 6, Burbank, CA.

You can buy tickets by clicking here!

If you live in the area and are interested in seeing the film this may be the last chance for quite awhile to see it. To watch the trailer for "Tracy" click here!

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-08-08T21:22:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"They don’t tell you what else happens when a bell rings."

Here are the leftovers...

Having impure thoughts is a sin

I’m going to go get Ted Williams autograph.

Here's this weeks Nominees...

"I'm only here for the summer."
Submitted by John Levesque
Seattle, Wash.

"Do you have any previous whistle-blowing experience?"
Submitted by Sara Kallstrom
Durand, Wis.

"Pack your things, Benson, adult swim is over."
Submitted by Eric Pegnam
Medford, Mass.

I entered...

"It's hard to believe my career started as a summer job."

The Cagennection

2010-08-06T23:42:00.000-07:00

The Internet is a Monopoly!

Welcome to the planet's first alternative to the world wide web... Enter.."The Cagennection"!

"The Cagennection" is just as awesome as the "The Internet", but with none of the commercial advertisements, or intellectual properties!

Unlike the internet we don't allow piracy, or copyright infringement! That's right, we only accept 100% public domain music, photos, and written content! Not convinced to switch from the internet to the cage for your online needs? Well here's a taste of what you'll finding "Touring" the "Cage" at this very moment...

Imagine printing out these dynamic images as you download "Mary's a Grand Old Name" on to your itouch, while scrolling through Frank Preston Stearns: Cambridge Sketches!!! The Cage can make it happen!

But that's not all, we also don't allow slander! "The Cage" makes sure that all written criticism, comments, or posts are verified as fact before being published. Oh, and there is no pornography!!!

But enough talk, if you truly want to experience the future of computerized information collection, then be the first to "Engage with the Cage". Hold on to your seats, forget the past, look to the future, ready? SET, ENGAGE THE CAGE!!!!! and click HERE!!!!!

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-08-02T22:18:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"Is this lens better or worse?"

Here are the leftovers...

I’m afraid you only have 325 months to live.

It’s going to be malignant.

Oh yeah, there are tiny insects crawling all over your face.

Here are this weeks nominees...

"This is moving too fast for me."
Submitted by Augusta Meill
Jamaica Plain, Mass.

"Would it kill you to ask for directions?"
Submitted by Joel Allen
New York, N.Y.

"Not tonight, Harry, I'm carsick."
Submitted by Suzy Stayman
Wellesley, Mass.

I entered...
"I guess it’s technically a hybrid."

Mad Women

2010-08-01T00:41:00.000-07:00

Michele entered the Banana Republic Casting Call Contest to get a walk on role on season 5 of the AMC show "Mad Men". She was rejected based on the photo below.

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-07-25T21:06:00.000-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"It's hard to believe my career started as a summer job."

Here are the leftovers...

Have you considered buy lifeguard insurance?

I accidentally grabbed my son’s work chair today.

You need to wait a half hour after eating before groveling.

Notice there’s no “P” in my office pool.

Here's this weeks nominees...

"Personally, I think Prozac is a lot easier."
Submitted by Ken Hunt
Bloomsburg, Pa.

"The monkeys themselves should come in three to six weeks."
Submitted by Benjamin Nyberg
Los Angeles, Calif.

"They'd probably be more fun if the barrel had air holes."
Submitted by Andrew Steiner
Bend, Ore.

I entered...
"Not as much fun when you don’t poke holes in the barrel."

Tracy Screening in L.A. Date Change

2010-07-24T01:49:00.000-07:00

"Tracy" got into the Burbank International Film Festival... but the festival has been pushed back to September.

I'll post the date and venue as soon as I hear!

Dan

this Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

2010-07-19T23:36:00.001-07:00

Here is my entry in this weeks New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"I guess it’s technically a hybrid."

Here are the leftovers...

You’re obviously under compensating for something.

No I don’t want to put the top up.

I don’t feel comfortable doing this at your parent’s house.

This sports car really does make you seem younger.

We should talk about what furniture is coming to the new house.

Here are this weeks nominees...

"And this is our new incentive plan."
Submitted by Milton Sturm
New City, N.Y.

"Or we go to Plan B and slip something in his coffee."
Submitted by Bill Stone
Stanford, Calif.

"Your father's last wish was for you to succeed him as chairman."
Submitted by George Wickham
Richmond, Va.

I entered...
"It sends fifty thousand volts of synergy through the body."

I'm On Twitter...Sadly this Time it's for Real

2010-07-18T00:01:00.000-07:00

Hey, I'm on Twitter!

So far I've Tweeted just about nothing! If you want to read what the real me has to say click @mrdanscanlon! Chances are you'll be directed to a link that sends you back to this blog. Enjoy!

Dan